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Monday, April 19, 2010

BREAKUP 101: LET'S STEP IT UP LADIES



Well ladies, we all know breakups are tough. Especially when you have shared memories and invested time in building a relationship that came crashing down. Yes, we as women do have an emotional streak in our gene pool where we feel it sometimes. Not saying men don't have emotions or feeling, because they definitely do--they just can hide it better. Woman have also mastered the poker face, but everyone knows what happens behind closed doors is not always told (im just saying lol). Anyway, when you breakup with

someone doesn't it feel like you just lost a little piece of yourself?Well, we feel this way because we do! Walking back and forth, analyzing every little detail, asking friends what to do about the situation a 100 times a day, and stalking his facebook*myspace(and basically everything he has on the internet). The one I see the most is checking his emails and hacking into his personal until he changes his password. RIDICULOUS!..this kind of behavior is not acceptable!..he's not going to want you, he's going to want to run away from you, because you're a STALKER!
Ladies...!!! You must get a hold of yourself, embrace the pain and start working on getting back on your feet. I have concocted a theory in which if done right you will be able to get over that ex in no time!

BREAKUP 101:
RID YOURSELF OF HIS BELONGINGS:
Now ladies, I can't lie, I have a nice collection of all my ex's belongings. I like to call it "garments on memory lane." They vary from jewelry, clothes, and even love notes (and hate notes lol), but you must leave these possesions somewhere you can't see them and look at them every 5 seconds. Give them to someone to hold or put it somewhere that you dont look at everyday. Better yet, throw it out if you can manage it!, but no matter what leave the trash in the past.
DELETE ANY SOURCE OF CONTACT:
Now this rule will only apply and affectively work if you really want to get rid of this guy. In your mind when

you first break up with someone I find it very hard not to want to call and just say hey, or maybe even start an argument just to talk to him, or the "creme de la creme" call and hang up..ugh!! that is the worst. So if he has a facebook, number, aim, bbm, etc; delete it all!!..dont waste another minute, you have to disperse all mental notion of him ever being alive lol.
DO SOMETHING CRAZY!:
Put on that feminine, women = power song and just sing your broken heart out. Cry, yell, and shout, as much as you can, but dont turn that song off. Keep it on repeat and let the emotions run rampid. You have a right to express your feelings. If you want to be even more bold, do it with some trusted girlfriends. not the ones that are going to make you feel like running back to the man that just dumped you, but the ones that are going to hold you down and have your back through the storm. I even have some songs for you that will release the craziness going on:
1. THE LYING MAN- I Just Want It To Be Over: Keysha Cole
2.THE CHEATING MAN- Not Gonna Cry: Mary J Blige
(more than a one time cheating man..i prefer I Hate You So Much Right Now: Kelis)
3. THE UNAPPRECIATIVE MAN- Superwoman: Karen White
4. THE LAZY MAN- Rain On Me: Ashanti
5. HE DUMPED YOU MAN- I Remember: Keysha Cole
(if it was a mega dumping fest,i suggest How To Sleep With a Broken Heart- Alicia Keys)
There are many more songs out there that will help you mend your broken heart, but these are personally my favorite and have helped me through the rough times. Especially Ms. Amy Winehouse!, nobody has had heartbreak like that woman!
GET A NEW ATTITUDE:
At this point you need to regroup. you are all cried out and now your just pissed off. wondering if hes thinking about you? maybe, maybe not, BUT THAT DOESNT MATTER!!. You need to do some

reinvention, go get your hair done, mani's and pedi's, do some shopping, go see a movie, have a nice lunch with a girl friend. Just be easy! You dont need to sit in front of the television watching chick flicks, eating popcorn with hot sauce lol and 13g of fat ice cream. You dont need to get fat and be more depressed. You need to get up and get out of the house. I know you dont want to, but it has to be done for yourself.
MENTAL RENEWAL STAGE:
Ok, so most woman forget this stage, that's why there are so many "MAN HATING WOMAN". You need

this time to clear your mind. Find the lesson and learn from it. Take some time to yourself and reflect on all that has happened. What you can grow from and what you need to leave on that dusty road called the past. Take

a hot bath and relax, get it through your mind that your not alone, plenty woman have gone through it and have bounced back lovely as ever. **Also DRILL into your head, ALL MEN ARE NOT THE SAME**. My mother always used to tell me "baby girl, you have to kiss alot of frog to get to prince charming." Relationships are based on what you can and can not, will and will not except. At this time, find out what you will and can except and what you won't. it will save alot of issue and drama next time.
DONT BE AFRAID TO STEP OUT, BUT TAKE IT SLOW:
As a woman, there are not alot of things you can't have. Living in the times that we do, we are allowed alot more than our parents and grandparents were. So take advantage, go out, do something for yourself, have a date or two, do some soul searching. But PLEASE!!!..GO SLOW!..there is no rush, you dont have to jump into another relationship. Its like having a wound that just healed and then reopening it. Not only does it hurt, but...

it's new again. Similar to your feelings. you don't want to pour your soul to some new douche bag who doesnt even know your last name. You need to give yourself sometimes to be clear minded and drama free. No one likes baggage ladies and no man wants to be put into the category or reminded every ten minutes that your ex did this and that. Its a definite buzz kill and a drag.

So here we are, I have showed you the way ladies, be mindful that it's not the end of the world. Yes he may have been your everything, but you will have others that are your everything as well. I hate these myths that say you only get one or maybe two true loves if your lucky. That's such bullshit!!..I'm sorry,but there are billions of ppl on this planet (maybe more,because you know everybody doesnt do their census lol)..do you really think you'll only have two loves? NO WAY!!...true love will find you, give it time ladies, just give it time.

check out the blog for more interesting thoughts from the MANEATER!
http://nomorewhitegloves.blogspot.com/

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